If you thought Robin Thicke's song "Blurred Lines" was rapey, then just wait until you read the lyrics from the song "Kiss the Girl" by Ashley Tisdale from Disney. Go ahead, take a look.
"Kiss the Girl"
http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/ashleytisdale/kissthegirl.html
Let's go through and analyze these lyrics.
"She don't got a lot to say"
+ So she hasn't given any indication that she's interested in the boy, but what does the song tell the boy to do? It tells him to kiss her anyway.
"Yes, you want her. Look at her, you know you do. It's possible she wants you too."
+ Again, there's no mention of her wishes. And, the song is saying that because it's possible she wants you too, then that means she does. This is classic male mis-interpretation of female behavior to suit their entitled feelings. I'm surprised this song didn't say "she's wearing something sexy, better go assault her because you feel like it."
+ Notice how "the girl" is objectified: she doesn't even have a name.
"There's one way to ask her. It don't take a word, not a single word. Go on and kiss the girl."
+ Wow, just wow. The song even says that the boy shouldn't ask if it's okay to kiss her, it just tells the boy to go for it in typical dude-bro fashion.
"She don't say a word. And she wont say a word until you kiss the girl."
+ Yeah, she'll probably say something like, "what the hell is wrong with you?!"
Oh, but do go on about how there's no rape culture.
Friday, March 20, 2015
Saturday, January 31, 2015
It's Different When Women Do It
I was recently arguing with a white male, and he said that if I really wanted equality (here we go with the mainsplaining, am I right?) I wouldn't just condemn bad behaviors that are typically male, I would also condemn bad behaviors that are typically female, such as paternity fraud and false rape accusations. Furthermore, he said, I should have no problem calling it "fem-ternity fraud" or "fem-alse rape accusations" like how I say "man-spreading" or "man-terrupting".
Needless to say, I was mortified. Not only is this absolutely missing the point, but this white male had the audacity to tell me what "equality" is. So, let me explain why it's different when women do bad things.
Paternity Fraud - The Patriarchy is constantly trying to control women's reproduction, so if women puppeteer a man's reproductive power, that's actually fair. Women will stop doing it to men as soon as the Patriarchy stops doing it to us. THAT is equality.
False Rape Accusations - A false rape accusation is a perfectly reasonable thing to do in our Patriarchal society. After all, as Susan Brownmiller observed, "Rape is nothing more or less than a conscious process of intimidation by which all men keep all women in a state of fear".
Given this, it's clear that false rape accusations give women a way to push back against the rape-cultured Patriarchy, and to make at least some men know what it's like to live in fear of the other gender. Maybe this will actually make them think about the issues, as Catherine Comins also thought.
"They [victims of false accusations] have a lot of pain, but it is not a pain that I would necessarily have spared them. I think it ideally initiates a process of self-exploration. 'How do I see women?' 'If I didn't violate her, could I have?' 'Do I have the potential to do to her what they say I did?'"
But it goes beyond paternity fraud and false rape accusations. There are many more instances where it's okay if a woman harms a man, but when a man harms a woman it's part of a bigger picture of oppression and it's a million times worse for that reason.
Violence - Just like with rape, men use violence to keep all women in line. Dating, marriage, and male sexuality are all ways in which men lure and trap women with them so they can abuse them and keep them subjugated. So if a woman acts violently toward a man, it's perfectly reasonable. You wouldn't fault a Jew for punching a Nazi, would you? As Andrea Dworkin wrote,"Marriage as an institution developed from rape as a practice."
Robbery - As we know, women still only earn 77 cents to every dollar a man earns, and it's all caused by discrimination by men against women. So, if a woman robs a man, that's actually fair: he's part of the Patriarchy that robs women throughout their entire lives, so really, what's one car in comparison to $700,000 stolen by men from women? If anything, it's not enough.
Insults - When a man insults a woman, it's essentially a form of hate crime by men against women, while the reverse is simply not true. This article covers this and similar topics nicely.
In conclusion: women can do the same bad things as men, but in every situation, it's worse when a man does it because when a man does it, it's part of the Patriarchy, but when a woman does it, it's just an isolated incident. If anything, she's probably correcting some injustice if she does something bad to a man. That, mr. white cis male, is equality.
Needless to say, I was mortified. Not only is this absolutely missing the point, but this white male had the audacity to tell me what "equality" is. So, let me explain why it's different when women do bad things.
Paternity Fraud - The Patriarchy is constantly trying to control women's reproduction, so if women puppeteer a man's reproductive power, that's actually fair. Women will stop doing it to men as soon as the Patriarchy stops doing it to us. THAT is equality.
False Rape Accusations - A false rape accusation is a perfectly reasonable thing to do in our Patriarchal society. After all, as Susan Brownmiller observed, "Rape is nothing more or less than a conscious process of intimidation by which all men keep all women in a state of fear".
Given this, it's clear that false rape accusations give women a way to push back against the rape-cultured Patriarchy, and to make at least some men know what it's like to live in fear of the other gender. Maybe this will actually make them think about the issues, as Catherine Comins also thought.
"They [victims of false accusations] have a lot of pain, but it is not a pain that I would necessarily have spared them. I think it ideally initiates a process of self-exploration. 'How do I see women?' 'If I didn't violate her, could I have?' 'Do I have the potential to do to her what they say I did?'"
But it goes beyond paternity fraud and false rape accusations. There are many more instances where it's okay if a woman harms a man, but when a man harms a woman it's part of a bigger picture of oppression and it's a million times worse for that reason.
Violence - Just like with rape, men use violence to keep all women in line. Dating, marriage, and male sexuality are all ways in which men lure and trap women with them so they can abuse them and keep them subjugated. So if a woman acts violently toward a man, it's perfectly reasonable. You wouldn't fault a Jew for punching a Nazi, would you? As Andrea Dworkin wrote,"Marriage as an institution developed from rape as a practice."
Robbery - As we know, women still only earn 77 cents to every dollar a man earns, and it's all caused by discrimination by men against women. So, if a woman robs a man, that's actually fair: he's part of the Patriarchy that robs women throughout their entire lives, so really, what's one car in comparison to $700,000 stolen by men from women? If anything, it's not enough.
Insults - When a man insults a woman, it's essentially a form of hate crime by men against women, while the reverse is simply not true. This article covers this and similar topics nicely.
In conclusion: women can do the same bad things as men, but in every situation, it's worse when a man does it because when a man does it, it's part of the Patriarchy, but when a woman does it, it's just an isolated incident. If anything, she's probably correcting some injustice if she does something bad to a man. That, mr. white cis male, is equality.
Saturday, January 24, 2015
Men Feel Entitled to Everything
We all know that men, through Patriarchy, tell each other that they deserve everything, which makes men much more selfish and demanding than women in our society (Patriarchy is bad for men, too, remember). Today I want to go over some examples of male entitlement that you may not be aware of, but which feed the Patriarchy like a fat, complacent pig.
Male Sexual Urges
We all know that advertisements with attractive women are symptoms of the fact that men feel entitled to women's bodies, but most of my fellow feminists don't realize that it goes even deeper than that. Men's sexual urges are, themselves, an innate sense of entitlement: the entitlement to have sexual release, and that is sick. You don't need sexual release to survive, but men still selfishly seek it, which, if they can get it, validates their entitlement mentality. To combat this, women should not have sex with any man who is the least bit interested in it because this will only validate his sense of entitlement, not only to your body, but also to sexual satisfaction. As Ti-Grace Atkinson wrote, "Feminism is the theory; lesbianism is the practice."
I can already hear the critics saying, "But aren't female sexual urges also a feeling of entitlement?" No: Female sexual urges are not feelings of entitlement because women aren't in power, and you can't feel entitled to something if you don't have power in society. It's only oppressive and entitled when men do it.
Men being physically larger than women
As I explained in a previous blog post, Patriarchy encourages men to eat more and become bigger and taller than women. This is already an example of men feeling entitled to eat more food than women, but it also demonstrates that men feel entitled to take up more space than women (manspreading is also a symptom of this entitlement). Conversely, anorexia is almost entirely a female problem because the Patriarchy tells women not to take up so much space, so they submit and eat less, often dangerously so.
Male Dominance in Unpleasant Jobs
Construction workers, factory workers, garbageMEN, you've heard about how many men there are working these "unpleasant jobs". MRAs love to say that men work these jobs because they are expected to, and they claim that this is an issue for men, but actually, men work these jobs because of their sense of entitlement to being important. Everyone knows how important construction, factories, and waste management are in the modern world, and men feel entitled to be a part of these important parts of our society, which is why they are overwhelmingly represented in these jobs. Women, on the other hand, choose not to work these "unpleasant jobs" because they've internalized their non-importance.
Anything that Makes Men Suffer
Men feel entitled even to suffering. Suffering is part of being human, and since most men don't view women as fully human (feminism is the radical idea that women are people too), they intentionally make their lives difficult in order to experience the full range of the human condition, which they deny to women when they snag all the "difficult jobs" I mentioned above. This is why men commit suicide at three times the rate that women do: because they feel entitled to being fully human and experiencing the full range of human experiences.
Male Sexual Urges
We all know that advertisements with attractive women are symptoms of the fact that men feel entitled to women's bodies, but most of my fellow feminists don't realize that it goes even deeper than that. Men's sexual urges are, themselves, an innate sense of entitlement: the entitlement to have sexual release, and that is sick. You don't need sexual release to survive, but men still selfishly seek it, which, if they can get it, validates their entitlement mentality. To combat this, women should not have sex with any man who is the least bit interested in it because this will only validate his sense of entitlement, not only to your body, but also to sexual satisfaction. As Ti-Grace Atkinson wrote, "Feminism is the theory; lesbianism is the practice."
I can already hear the critics saying, "But aren't female sexual urges also a feeling of entitlement?" No: Female sexual urges are not feelings of entitlement because women aren't in power, and you can't feel entitled to something if you don't have power in society. It's only oppressive and entitled when men do it.
Men being physically larger than women
As I explained in a previous blog post, Patriarchy encourages men to eat more and become bigger and taller than women. This is already an example of men feeling entitled to eat more food than women, but it also demonstrates that men feel entitled to take up more space than women (manspreading is also a symptom of this entitlement). Conversely, anorexia is almost entirely a female problem because the Patriarchy tells women not to take up so much space, so they submit and eat less, often dangerously so.
Male Dominance in Unpleasant Jobs
Construction workers, factory workers, garbageMEN, you've heard about how many men there are working these "unpleasant jobs". MRAs love to say that men work these jobs because they are expected to, and they claim that this is an issue for men, but actually, men work these jobs because of their sense of entitlement to being important. Everyone knows how important construction, factories, and waste management are in the modern world, and men feel entitled to be a part of these important parts of our society, which is why they are overwhelmingly represented in these jobs. Women, on the other hand, choose not to work these "unpleasant jobs" because they've internalized their non-importance.
Anything that Makes Men Suffer
Men feel entitled even to suffering. Suffering is part of being human, and since most men don't view women as fully human (feminism is the radical idea that women are people too), they intentionally make their lives difficult in order to experience the full range of the human condition, which they deny to women when they snag all the "difficult jobs" I mentioned above. This is why men commit suicide at three times the rate that women do: because they feel entitled to being fully human and experiencing the full range of human experiences.
Thursday, January 22, 2015
Everything is a Power Dynamic
Under Patriarchy, everything is a power dynamic; a subtle reminder by men that men socially outrank women. One way or another, men in a patriarchy can and do find every possible way to assert themselves over women and re-affirm their superiority and power over women. To help you see these power dynamics, I've compiled a list of some common ones, some of which you are probably unaware of. That's why I'm here.
Rape and Rape Culture
"Rape is nothing more or less than a conscious process of intimidation by which all men keep all women in a state of fear." - Susan Brownmiller
As Brownmiller correctly observed, rape (by definition, a male-on-female crime) is the crowning achievement of Patriarchy, and while individual men might claim to oppose rape, deep down they know that they need rape in order to maintain their power. Indeed, when you disguise the question, a staggering 1/3 of all men would gladly rape a woman. And, of course, there are many brainwashed women out there who, like the citizens of North Korea, just can't see how horrible this finding really is, and they write post after post after video attempting to dismiss the fact that their beloved men are actually part of a huge power dynamic called Rape Culture, and that they, as men, are hurting women.
Manspreading
Manspreading is where a man sits with his legs open in public spaces. This is actually two power dynamics in one. First, it is a way for men to take up as much space as possible to advertise their power, as well as their spatial entitlement, to the women around them. Second, it exposes and frames their genital area to women, which serves to remind women of men's primary power dynamic that is rape. Manspreading is similar to bropen-mouth chewing.
Men being physically stronger than women
Men tend to be stronger than women in order to maintain their dominion over women, because when push comes to shove, literally, the stronger group wins (and rapes).
"Males, however, are socially pressured to enhance their upper body muscles, leading to a wider difference in upper body strength."
Birke, Lydia. The Gender and Science Reader ed. Muriel Lederman and Ingrid Bartsch. New York, Routledge, 2001. 306-322
And social pressure comes from the Patriarchy, so is it any wonder that most men become stronger than women? This learned strength difference sets the stage for a whole host of other micro-aggressions that remind women of their subjugated standing. Note: individual instances where one particular man is much weaker than average men don't count because they aren't part of the Patriarchy oppressing women.
• Firm handshakes - A form of physical assault to women who are unable to match the firm grip.
• Heavy doors - An affirmation that women can't compete in a man's world, where men suffer much less inconvenience from such heavy doors.
• Manual-Start Engines - Much like heavy doors, the fact that manually-started engines require a great deal of strength serves to reinforce the idea that women are lesser than men. It also discourages women from entering the comfortable careers of car mechanics, factory workers, etc.
Men being taller than women
In much the same way that men are encouraged to exercise more than women to maintain their dominance, men are also encouraged to eat more and to eat healthier than their female peers, which not only bolsters their physical strength, but it also makes them taller than most women, which allows them to literally look down on women (reflecting their internalized misogyny) and it makes the women around them feel less significant.
The fact that many women are attracted to taller men is simply the result of their internalized misogyny which has been conditioned into them throughout their entire lives.
Fart Rape
This power dynamic has already been explained by feminist Ashleigh Ingle. Essentially, it's yet another way that men overpower women and keep them in their places.
“By farting louder the man is using passive aggressive violence to position himself as dominant, this intimidates the woman to subconsciously not release as much flatulence and thus the woman fearing for her safety doesn’t fart as loud as a sign of submissiveness, this in turn contributes to rape culture and women being oppressed.”
It's highly likely that men choose to eat foods that produce louder farts for this reason.
Beards
Beards highlight and enlarge a man's jaw, making him appear stronger than he really is, which also reinforces his sense of entitlement to power. This is a power dynamic that serves to remind women that they, who cannot grow beards, are weaker and inferior to men. Hillary Clinton agrees:
"Beards are thus a prominent symbol of patriarchal oppression. Growing a beard is an action of hatred and misogyny, that will not be tolerated in my America" - Hillary Clinton
Anything
As I explained earlier, anything and everything can be seen as a misogynistic power dynamic; you just need to look close enough and keep an open mind.
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